I’m Thankful,

 This post will be serious, and I’ll spill a little of my guts, but, don’t get used to it, I enjoy making you smile, and laugh.
I’m not doing this post because it’s the Thanksgiving season. I’m doing this because I got a phone call from my Mom, she had news about a Cousin of mine. This cousin is in her 30’s, and has young children, and has just found out that she has cancer. It has spread so much that they have scheduled her for surgery, and this is her only recourse. They will remove an eye, most of her face, part of her jaw and nose. If all of that is successful, she will then go in for chemo, and later God willing, reconstructive surgery.
I have learned to become a person who is thankful for what I have, for my life and my children. I grew up in a violent, angry home, where there was no respect for Women/Females. I married very young to a Man who was impossible to please, had no respect for me and was just as violent as what I grew up with. I’ve had a child sexually molested, and came as close to a nervous breakdown, from that, as I ever have. I knew I had to be strong for my child. For anyone that has ever gone through this, you will know and understand, you question everything, there’s fear, worry, anxiety, hate, and you hate, at least I did, myself. I had a very wise Man spend some time with me, he taught me to (try) to let go of the things I have no control over. To be thankful for today,… today my children are safe, today I am healthy, my family is healthy, I have a home, food, and most importantly, I have Love. Today is good, enjoy today, embrace it with open arms, you never know what tomorrow will bring.
I’m very proud of my cousin, she’s so strong, and brave. I know that part of why she’s willing to go through all of this is because of her love for her husband and children. I admire her more than I could ever say.
Kay,(http://spaces.msn.com/members/captmaryflint/PersonalSpace.aspx?_c=) you dear funny, wonderful lady, who brings laughter into my life, all while going through chemo, my admiration extends to you too.
I’m thankful for today,
For the beauty that it brings,
For friends far and near,
For a healthy mind and body,
For laughter and love,
I’m thankful for today.

14 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Darren
    Nov 15, 2005 @ 15:04:01

    Best wishes for your cousin and thanks for the reminder of what I need to be thankful for each day.


  2. Tim
    Nov 15, 2005 @ 15:18:18

    Steph,I\’m truly sorry to hear about your cousin. I know I have so much to be thankful for. It\’s good sometimes to put our lives in perspective.And, BTW, I have NO doubt that M. will be able to defend herself when necessary. 😉


  3. Indigo-XX
    Nov 15, 2005 @ 21:22:04

    I\’m also incredibly thankful for your sharing your cat photos…what sweeties!


  4. EdgyKay
    Nov 15, 2005 @ 22:24:41

    I am sending strong and positive thoughts to you and your family. It\’s an awful thing sometimes, this life we live. But it\’s also full of grand surprises and marvelous gifts. Being thankful is easy when you see how hard others have it.I am indeed richly blessed. And don\’t sell yourself short — I think you\’ve won your share of battles, too. It\’s funny: just when we think our life is as crappy as it could be, we hear of someone else who has a far bigger heartache.My mother always said that we\’d pick up our same burdens to bear, given the choice of our troubles or the troubles of others. She\’s right, of course.Thank you for your kind words, and tell your cousin there\’s a haggy old pirate who\’s praying for her. We Presbyterian pirates get the job done, Man!


  5. Brad
    Nov 15, 2005 @ 23:57:23

    Hey, Wow, that\’s a tough break. Doctors are really good helping people with cancer. I know a lot of people who lived through it. Cancer certainly takes away, but surviving it also gives them a second chance at life and I think a new perspective about what really matters. I am hoping the best for her!


  6. Brad
    Nov 16, 2005 @ 00:01:12

    Oh, and "Junior" and "pumpkin" look like my last two cats "Boo Boo" and "Mick"! Those are cool looking cats!


  7. bren
    Nov 16, 2005 @ 05:13:27

    The strength and endurance of others is simply amazing – best of wishes for your cousin. that junior coming outta the shed? — what a perfect picture!


  8. plazticman
    Nov 16, 2005 @ 11:53:40

    one perfect cup of hot chocolate with whip cream. Just for you. I read a story on another blog. I do not remember where but the story touched me. She said in the usual polite way which is to say something without meaning "Hope you are haveing a nice day" he stopped looked at her and said in a very meaningful way "Any day above ground is a good day." Life is fleeting and everyone has bad things happen. However I have learned that TODAY is an important day because I am "above ground". Excellent post I am glad to know you better to.


  9. Litespreader
    Nov 16, 2005 @ 13:19:32

    i\’ll be praying for your cousin and your family. thank you forsharing that, and reminding me about how important gratitudeis for me, every day. t


  10. Gina
    Nov 16, 2005 @ 15:54:22

    Much luck and love to your truly brave cousin. She will be in my thoughts and prayers. Thank you so much for making me stop for a moment and think about all of my blessings. Many hugs to you and your family!Mannyed


  11. Jim
    Nov 17, 2005 @ 08:58:34

    Hi Steph, glad you and your children made it through the hard times. Hope all goes well for you cousin, that is more than I have every faced, and if or when it come I hope I can be strong. I don\’t or refuse to understand hurting a child, and something like that bring up my inter demon of kill the assholes. And I have never hit a woman, well maybe on accident, when I was playing or not paying attention, I am a little bit too strong, I have always worked out with weights, and I have to be careful around tender women! But other than that I\’m ok. I guess we all need to think about things to be thankful for and who knows what changes are instore for next year. So have the best holidy! I\’m working on some neked pics.Jim


  12. Stephanie
    Nov 17, 2005 @ 09:44:12

    I want to tell All of you, just how much I appreciate all the warm, best wishes, prayers and encouragement for my Cousin, and for your support and friendship. I\’m glad this has helped you, as it\’s helped me, to remember all the wonderful things I have in my life. We may not have met in real life, but, I consider each of you a dear friend, very special to me. @Darren, Thank You!****************************************************************************@Tim, It is good to put things in to perspective, and sounds like you are raising a great girl there (and boy).****************************************************************************@Indi, I\’m very thankful for those furry lil babies in my life.****************************************************************************@Kay, Your Mom is very wise, as are you. I appreciate the humor and insight you give all of us each day. ****************************************************************************@BRAD, Thanks! I\’m hoping she has some very good Doctors. I\’m waiting to see pics of your MEGACAT. lol****************************************************************************@Brenda, That\’s Junior\’s brother, Rascal, they look very much alike, both are sweethearts. I\’m glad you all liked the pics of my babies.****************************************************************************@Plaz, that is a great story, another reminder to be thankful! You make the best Hot Chocolate! lol****************************************************************************@T, It is for me too. Sometimes I get going and forget, but, I try not to.****************************************************************************@Mannyed, Thank You. Give Manny some luvin, and Cat Nip for me. ****************************************************************************@Jim, You are a kind and wonderful Man. (We should leave hints to Rain(T) that she should meet you.) LMAO OH, and hurry up with those pictures! lmao****************************************************************************


  13. David
    Nov 20, 2005 @ 17:20:14

    Your cousin\’s ordeal is just horrifying. I often wonder how people stand things like that. I really am not sure I could. I have a visceral anger in my gut for men who abuse their wives and children. It is one of the things I can not forgive or excuse – I could never be friends or "there for" any man whom I knew to do this. I don\’t know why I have such a strong reaction to it (since I\’m a guy myself), but I do. I hate bullying of any sort. My very best female friend endured this, and the sad thing is once she was free of this lout, she still has to deal with a child who was permanently damaged (emotionally) by the behavior he witnessed, and the government removal of him from the home for a period (which was not unwarranted, given his father\’s behavior). I have observed a couple things in common among the women I know who have wound up with these assholes (pardon my french). One is that they feel (often wrongly) that they are not pretty, and that \’pretty\’ is all that matters. Second, they feel they HAVE to be married (or at least have a guy). In some cases, they have to be married by a certain age. I have no children of my own, but I have nieces, and I tell them over and over that they don\’t HAVE to have a guy; they don\’t have to be married. The issue of "pretty" is harder to deal with, because when the subject rises, you have already raised a flag that maybe she has issues in that area. But if a girl thinks she is a terrific catch, she usually winds up catching a pretty great guy. And pretty gets you nowhere after a certain age. Guys looking for \’pretty\’ have a tendency to keep looking after they have already found one wife. I also remember a lot of high school girls going on about their b.f. \’taking them for granted\’, and wanting to make him jealous. Not really sure what they wanted him to do to prove his jealousy, but I\’m here to tell you that guys usually don\’t deal with jealousy by sending flowers. The only upside these days, is that these women have some recourse (they are in danger, but at least someone will listen and help). When I was young, a friend\’s father was a known lout, and I realize now he must have been a terror to not only his wife but his kids – and one night the wife fled forever, and people generally felt she was derelict in her duty. To my mind it is not a \’duty\’ worth dying for, which may well have been her alternative. Oh dear, you\’ve got me going on one of my hot buttons…


  14. SAAM
    Nov 21, 2005 @ 17:37:01

    I\’ve been to Kay\’s Space and didn\’t realize she was your cousin. I\’m really sorry. Thinking and praying for her


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