I think enough time has passed, and the trauma lessened to an extent that I can write about this, and be somewhat objective… although I still have flashbacks, I’m thinking maybe, therapy????
My youngest daughter’s school has a "Buddy Day", she and her 2 bestfriends decided they would take the advice and all dress alike.
This is where my nightmare starts….
The only day they could all go shopping together was Sunday, one of the most crowded and traffic wise, horrific days of the week. Oh yeah, I was nominated to take them. (oh joy) Three girls, ages 10 and 11, two very tall blondes, one very petite hispanic with a pixie face, and they all want outfits to match. Size wise, I can already see a huge problem, little Ash is about half the size of my daughter and Jen, and height wise she comes to their shoulders. Lisa and Jen look like Amazon Women when Ash is standing with them. Have I mentioned that each girl in her own right is a major Diva? I include my daughter, easily, she reminds me so much of my sister, she got the, Italian, "Drama" genes. They skipped me, and I spent most of growing up wondering what the big deal was all the time. I see now, dealing with my sister was training for dealing with my youngest!
Ok, on the drive over there, listening to Avril Lavene, and Kelly Clarkston, (over and over) (it’s about a 40 min drive), I was telling them they should just go to a store I know of that has thousands of t-shirts and all pick out the same shirt, then just wear blue jeans, etc.
I was informed that was NOT the plan, they want matching outfits and it has to be something nice. I took them to the store with the t-shirts, it has other clothing too, thing is, it’s mostly for older, (MUCH) older girls and is on the, what I would call, sleezy, hoochie mama, style of clothing. You guessed it, they LOVED it. They were in heaven looking at all the polyester, silky, sequins laden, belly showing, boob exposing, clothing. I spent the whole time in there trying to get them to look at the t-shirts, and saying things like, "I don’t think that your Mother would want you wearing that" or "I think that is meant for someone much older" Or, "NO". (sigh) What saved me, they couldn’t find anything that they all agreed on and would fit all 3, because of huge difference in their sizes. After spending what seemed like 3 days in that store, (ok so it was maybe 2 hours) I was hungry and getting tired of their running up and down the isles and "OH what about this one"? and then the debates that came after. I suggested lunch and hopefully a meeting of the minds on what they wanted to actually buy.
I took them to an all you can eat place. It was Sunday and they have really good food. My real motive, I could sit and eat and they could get up and down, up and down, back and forth, back and forth, getting their own food and dessert. I was hoping to take the edge of that excess energy of theirs! Watching what they each chose to eat was kind of interesting. I know my daughter, she has her very few favorites and spends most of the time at the desserts bar. Ash, the smallest, (a good gust of wind, and she’s gone) ate dinner rolls and a little bit of steak,… off to the dessert bar. Jen had a couple plates of real food, but, like the others, back and forth to the dessert bar. You know those rubber bouncing balls, you throw it and your never sure where it will end up but it just bounces wildly all over the place? I was watching 3 of them. (Is my eye starting to twitch?) Ok, our late lunch over, I ask, where to? They all decide that Walmart will DEFINATELY have something they all will like, and can wear. Oh, joy of joys, off to Wally World. Did I mention it’s Sunday? We spend another 2 plus hours at a very crowded Walmart, and it’s beginning to look like there is nothing that they can all agree on or would fit all 3 if they do like it. Again they are drawn to the section with clothing that is too old for them, but, they just adore it! Finally I start saying, (if I even hear a hint that they might like it) grab those and lets try some stuff on! We end up at the dressing rooms with a mini mountain of dresses, skirts, shirts etc for each girl. OHHHH now they are really excited! Thank goodness they have a bench there, I can sit down! I think, but i’m not sure, the next hour or so was spent with them each trying things on, looking at themselves, looking at each other, and I heard things like, OH this brown one looks terrible on me, OH I like the brown one, That brown one looks so cute on you! It does not look terrible! I need a bigger, I need a smaller size. etc etc. I look back on it now, I don’t think I was even there, much less listening. I was sitting down, and in my own special "quiet place". LOL They finally decided on a skirt, they all liked it… Problem # 1, it came in 3 colors, so, yep they had to try on all 3. Problem # 2, of course each girl decided they liked a different color. I suggested going with that, it was the same style, so they would all be dressed the same. Nope, they all had to decide on one color. I went to my quiet place again. Problem # 3, Ash was so much smaller than the other two, if they did decide on the one color, they weren’t sure there were the right sizes for everyone. Somewhere in between me basking on a sun warmed beach and eyeing tanned, muscular Men, they all decided on the purple skirt, and I think I heard that each girl had a size that fit! I thought ALRIGHT! Then with that decided, they all scattered to find a shirt that would match and they would all like…. the torture, it never ends! I tried, I have a great eye for color etc. Nothing I showed them worked… I lost track of time. I went back and sat down, where was I, oh yeah, the beach. Well they couldn’t find anything they liked, and they decided to go back to the first store we were at and get, T-SHIRTS! Gee, who said that would be a good idea??? OH YEAH , ME!
Knowing it was getting close to closing time, we head back to the other store. They look fondly at the, hoochie mama clothing, I steer them towards racks of plain little t-shirts, girl style ones. Then starts the ritual of trying on the t-shirts, and the comments that are of course a required part of said ritual. Ash was no problem to fit. The other two girls, well are more, healthy, and they make these t-shirts, some of them anyway for teens that like to have everything showing. It’s not flattering on an 11 yr old. They were having a great time, (translation) they were loud and running back and forth to the racks and dressing room. I had to tell Jen several times, NO, you need a bigger size. "But I like it tight"! Not that tight! Back and forth, loud, giggles, comments.. and it was closing time. The guy at the counter kept trying to catch my eye, I kept avoiding his. Finally we found sizes that would fit all, and then with the lights being turned off on us, they decide they want their shirts to have a saying printed on them! I say, girls, that’s not gonna happen tonight, they are closed. Awwws and disappointment voiced. They kept asking, "Are you sure?" by then the guy was ready to throw us out! Ash says, (and this kills me) "I could give him my "puppy dog eyes.", and proceeds to show me. Too funny, she’s 10 and already is thinking that way. Her Dad must be a sucker, and, young men, watch out for this one! lmao Anyway, we barely manage to get the guy to let us buy the t-shirts and we leave. It’s dark and late. I’m soooo ready to head home and they are wondering if there is any place else that will imprint the shirts! NOOOOOOOOOO, um I mean, no, not tonight.
We head home, with Avril and Kelly, and my daughter constantly switching from one track to another. I drop the other two girls off and head home. I arrive home about 9pm, quivering, twitching, massive headache, bloodshot eyes, (if anyone looks at me wrong, they will be sorry), and head to bed. Steph doesn’t live here anymore!