Ahhhh Saturday!

I’ve resorted to one of the oldest, ‘Mom tricks’ in the book, (if there were a book) and it’s one of my oldest tricks anyway. On Saturdays, I enjoy some quiet so I can have some, ‘Me’, time. This morning was especially bad, the girls started arguing over the, color of the sky, who looked at who, a volley of particularly imaginative names, etc etc. You get the idea. My son, oblivious to it all, (Sleeping Beauty) sleeps on and through it. Once in awhile you will hear a, "SHUUUT UP"! from the vicinity of his room… he’s ALIVE!
I had enough, (and since I had already threatened a plague upon their heads, see my post titled, Chapter 11 Verse 9) I put a new plan in motion. Tools needed, a secret file I keep on the computer, my printer and a straight, serious "Mom" face.
My kids all have jobs that they do within the house, and they rotate, once a week. It’s not anything big or difficult, just something so that they know and appreciate being part of the family…(well they will appreciate it one day). I have on my computer all the things that aren’t normally done, special jobs, as a list… it’s a big list. Think of it as boot camp of house cleaning, with a really cranky Sgt. watching your every move. They HATE that list. So, this morning the List makes an appearance. I don’t even have to say anything, it’s almost like they have a second sense. With the girls, I sat where they could see what I was doing and started to highlight jobs, and put names by them. I didn’t even get halfway through the list when they both just disappeared! I swear I didn’t even hear the door open or close! (They have gotten good!) Two down…. I go into S.B.’s room, I say, "Hey, Sleeping Beauty, (he LOVES when I call him that), I have the ‘extra job’ work list made out, it’s Saturday, and a perfect day to get a few things done".  Suddenly he’s wide awake, and remembers that he needs to be somewhere, right away! He took a shower and got dressed in record time, he was moving so fast he was a blur, and I think, but i’m not sure, that he climbed out his window!
I hate to publicly speak of this ‘secret weapon’ for fear I ruin it for some poor Mom, but, it’s 12:15pm, I have the computer to myself, the house is quiet, and the Cats are all napping. Damn I’m good! LOL

11 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Litespreader
    Nov 06, 2005 @ 09:42:20

    damn steph, that is brilliant!! sorry it\’s taken me so long to get here.. i appreciate all the kindness you\’ve brought to my place. i like your place here.. and i love this story! i\’ll be back…


  2. Indigo-XX
    Nov 06, 2005 @ 10:01:33

    OMG…You are SO freakin\’ brillilant! Last week (Thursday) I mentioned to my son that the grass needed to be cut one more time for the year – haven\’t seen him since ;)Your sample comments on Panoramic\’s space made me smile…ha! Thanks for joining my campaign, woo hoo!


  3. Brad
    Nov 06, 2005 @ 10:32:20

    OOOOh oooooh!!!! I bet I can guess what the place was that wanted to hire your son!! (Activate super genius power of logical deduction)…I won\’t say the name directly, but it rhymes with,….Hooters! Right? Does it rhyme with Hooters? Ok, that\’s what I thought!And, there were hundreds of episodes in my life, much like the "Crappy tree fort pee bucket incident" that helped to cultivate my "personality". I have always managed to get away "scott-free" from every incident I have created out of mischief. This is due to the fact that I am:1) Constructed from 90% Teflon.2) Way smarter than the average bear.3) I can run faster and jump higher than most athletes when; my life is in danger/being pursued by the cops/being chased down by disgruntled ex-girlfriends throwing beer bottles.


  4. Gene
    Nov 06, 2005 @ 18:46:58

    I don\’t believe I\’ve seen Arsenic and Old Lace, but I will look for it.Thank You.Geno 😉


  5. Gene
    Nov 06, 2005 @ 18:58:52

    The jobs yours! Are you experienced? As far as Salary, well, you know how us Universal Rulers are. We tend to brainwash alot, then we promise the world and give nothing. you know how it is. Goes with the job, sorry. (he he)Geno 😉


  6. Stephanie
    Nov 07, 2005 @ 08:00:38

    @Rain, Never a problem! I enjoy your space too, and thanks, once in awhile the ol brain works.. sometimes! lol@Indi, Thanks! I gots me sum edumacation!! LOL I think your son is hangin out with my kids!Panoramic\’s space is weird! (I\’m still gonna mess with them there though) LOL@MEGA, First I will plead the 5th. Second, No wonder you are a great Evil Scientist! Ex-Girlfriends with beer bottles huh? I wanna hear that story! (Notice I refrained from asking what 10% of you isn\’t Teflon?) I\’m behaving and I\’m so proud of myself! lol (But i\’m thinking it)@Geno, It\’s a wonderful old movie, twisted and funny, I hope you can find it.I\’m great at PR, and if I\’m not gonna get a good salary, well, i\’ll take the Lair and whatever Diamonds, Gold, Microsoft shares, or control of a small Island Country, in lieu of.


  7. EdgyKay
    Nov 07, 2005 @ 19:02:12

    I usually just come out of the bathroom, track down every son I have, and announce "Guess what? I have my period."It\’s funny. AND it makes them go away. They\’ll remember these moments when they\’re standing over my sleeping body, holding a freshly-sharpened ax, smiling creepily at Mommy dearest.


  8. Indigo-XX
    Nov 07, 2005 @ 20:45:18

    (for some reason, my computer locks up from the water background theme…excuse any typos, please) :)Go to http://www.blogshares.com to claim your blog – 80% of the shares are available to the public – guess which "public" just bought all your shares ;)Cha ching!


  9. SAAM
    Nov 08, 2005 @ 06:36:08

    Brilliant is right!! Can you patent that??SAAM


  10. K.T.
    Nov 08, 2005 @ 07:19:36

    Bad bad Kitty! You did not follow the rules, but i posted your entry anyways. You didnt say you were a guest blogger, you didnt say who you were and you didnt include a link to your space and it wasnt sent in HTML format(but it didnt make a difference. Sorry, I have to put you on probation. LOLK.T.


  11. Stephanie
    Nov 08, 2005 @ 15:32:52

    Hey, how\’d you know that was my nickname? lmao I\’m so sorry KT, I was so excited about getting it written and sent off to you that I forgot everything else! Probation huh? hmmmmm do I get an ankle bracelet??? Can we play, "Handcuffs and Find the Key"? LOL


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